ugh...bring stress back please. Busy days I want. Dont wanna think, don't wanna feel. please please please.

Everyday I have to remind myself why I can't love you anymore. Because if i stop even for a day, i'd only feel regret for letting you go.

Today someone asked me "why?". I thought I didn't feel anything when ours ended, i thought i have grown indifferent from all the hurts. Well, I was wrong. Now, can i move on? I want to. I just don't know anymore how to open that door.

Stress is good. It makes me forget :)

can't u see?

“I’m not the silly romantic you think. I don’t want the
heavens or the shooting stars. I don’t want gemstones or gold. I have
those things already. I want…a steady hand. A kind soul. I want to fall
asleep, and wake, knowing my heart is safe. I want to love, and be
loved.”— Shana Abé

Sometimes I feel like I've been alone for far too long... and it makes me wonder..what really matters most in this life? I dont know anymore... I feel like I'm just passing by.

Today... I realized and accepted, with no doubt, that it's over.
Maybe I'm all to blame.
That I've been weak.
But I did my best for this, and I asked God with everything that I am... but I guess it's too much to ask.. and I don't wanna insist anymore because I know His reasons for not giving me this one thing I ask the most... and I understand those reasons. And I'll be fine... it doesnt hurt anymore. Infact, it doesnt make me feel anything at all..