what hurt the most?

What hurt the most is not when I learned that he did not love me. It was not when he left me all alone. It was not when he found someone new. It was not when I was taken for granted. What hurt the most is not knowing what I am to him and not telling him how I felt about him. What hurt the most is the question that lingered and haunted me for years.. "What if?". And this time, I don't want that to happen again, this time, I want to know... I will find out the answer to that. I'm not backing up. I'm gonna let myself grow on you.